Posted by ManMan on July 28, 19100 at 06:08:33:
ManMan and Dancer : When Manny met Dancy. Hello! I’m mysterious narrator guy! Today, I’ll be guiding you through the first meeting between those two iconoclasts of the superhero world; ManMan his bladed sidekick, Knifey and the Probability Dancer, er.......Dancer! Ahem. Okaay one of those Heros will show up in juuust a second.......aHA! There! See ManMan? (also known as Joe Pepper, as I might refer to him throughout this wacky tale!) Good! Eyes are important! Right, now ManMan is feeling just a little bit low today and he doesn’t know why (well, secretly he does but he refuses to believe that the rash will stay much longer). But he’s decided the best remedy is to go out on the streets and kick some ass. Go Joe! The problem. He’s at the harbour in the middle of day! I mean, what criminal masterminds plot devious and wicked things in their hidden warehouse around lunchtime?? I bet most of them haven’t even gotten up yet! Except for that Hooded Hood character, night just seems to follow him everywhere......Brrr..... Anyway, there’s Joe. Not in a good mood...............and nothing’s happening. So let’s see what our other Hero is doing! As we magically swoop across the city of Parodiopolis, we have a moment to take in the sites...........................................................................................................................Oooh.....................................................Ahhhh................................... Aren’t they wonderful? Here we are! The Bean and Donut Coffee Bar! An innocent, homely place which hides a magnificent secret! One of the waitresses - Hang on, let me go inside. There! Sarah Shepherdson, the one who’s drawing all the admiring looks from the men (and the dirty ones from the women) is in fact the Probability Dancer, Dancer! Uh-oh, here she comes! “Anything you want?” “Uh.......Coffee. Please.” “Right.” She spoke to me! I’m feeling quite faint. Deep breaths mysterious narrator guy, deep breaths. Anyway, she’s feeling a bit down too! Is that just some weird coincidence? Or is it the plot of an evil international mastermind?? Actually, it is just a coincidence......Had you going though! “Here.” “Thanks! Er......Wouldn’t you like a tip?” “As long as that tip isn’t you telling me to get a shorter skirt.” “Nooo! Here you go.” I handed her a 5 dollar bill. “Thanks! If you want anything else, don’t be afraid to give me another tip.” She winked at me! And the money I handed her, she put it down her top! Wow............Right, back to the story, now that we’ve caught up with Dancer, let’s go back to Joe! Here he is! Just wandering through the harbour, let’s see what he’s talking to Knifey about. “I just can’t believe seagulls grow that big.” “Must be all the industrial waste lying around here, Joe. They do eat anything.” “It almost took my arm off!” “Be happy it only got away with some of your skin.” Hm......Not much happening here, either. But not to worry folks! Any second now, there’s gonna be some trouble! CRASH! See?!? “Holy crap!! What was that??” “Sounded like a big crash to me....” “Where’d it come from Knifey??” “Over there, I think.” And there we have it! As Joe rushes off toward the big flaming ship, we have a plot! Whoo-hoo! Let’s see how Sarah took that moment....... “Touch me again and you’ll find this breadstick entering you in a way you’ve never imagined.” CRASH! “What the-?” Now, Sarah is just activating her powers......Looks like she has a half day today......What luck! “I’m off Mr Papadopopolis!” Look at the way she runs.........................Sorry! Lost myself there. Let’s go to that ship! Wow......It sure is on fire! Can you feel that heat? Better get out your marshmallows! “Can’t see anyway in......” “I don’t see anyone in there Joe, better just to call the fire department and leave it.” As if on cue......... “Help me! Help me and my daughter!” “Only 2 people, we can do that!” Look at Joe run! The leather seams in his crotch area don’t help much, but what a guy! “Help me! Help me and my daughter! And my son!” “3’s still okay.......” “Help me! Help me and my daughter! And my son! And my husband! And our 12 dogs!” Joe, without thinking of his own safety.........I’m not sure if he thinks much at all, actually - Rushes onto the burning ship. He encounters a frantic woman, looking wide-eyed and scared......Getting tense now enh? “Where are the others?” “Down........down, in the engine room. I don’t know........Kevin, he took them down there.....The dogs! They’re up in the living quarters.....” “Hi there. Anything I can help you with?” Hey! It’s Dancer! She’s arrived just in time for the climactic scenes! Go Dancer! “Um......Yeah.......Dancer, right? Her family are downstairs, the dogs are up in the living quarters....I’ll go-” “Right.” And off she goes!......Looks like Sarah has an aversion to dogs, or to saving them, anyway! “Dammit. I’m meant to make the big save!........Um, lady...Can you walk? Good. Get off the ship, another explosion could kill us at any moment.” Joe never was a master of tact. But through her blubbing, the woman manages to scramble off the ship as she awaits her family anxiously at the harbourside. Let’s check on Dancer! Hmm......The smoke is pretty thick, let’s hope she finds them in time! “Anyone down here? *cough cough*” “Over here..........” “Hi there, little girl. Where’s the rest of your family?” “I don’t know....Daddy was with Tommy when I heard the big bang.....*cough cough*” “Okay honey, let’s get you out from under that rubbish...........There you go, can you grab hold of my neck? Good, that’s a good girl! What’s your name?” “.....Sarah.” “heh. Nice name.” Hey! It’s like the last few moments of Aliens, where Ripley goes to rescue Newt in the compound on LV-425 and then they both end up in the Queen Aliens chamber! Um.......Sarah’s gonna be at this awhile, let’s see how Joe’s getting on! “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!” “Maybe they like human meat?” “GET EM OFF! GET EM OFF!” “Aww......They’re just being friendly.....Aren’t you? Yes you are, you’re being a friendly little doggie....” “ROAR!” “Roar? That dog’s having an identity crisis.....Okay, Joe.....Will you stop letting that one chew your arm and listen to me a second?” “What? What??” “Just run out of the door and let them chase after you!” “Are you nuts? AAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!” “Good, knew you’d see it my way.” Ah....As always, the leather-clad hero has matters well under control. Let’s see if Sarah’s found the family yet. “Anyone? Tommy? *cough cough* What’s your father’s name honey?” “......Daddy.....” “heh....Okay, we’ll find them, I promise.” “....O-over......here.” Uh-oh......Looks like danger. That voice came from where the fire is raging! “Sarah. Stay here for a second will you, breathe through this handkerchief.....Yeah, that’s right. Now stay here, I’ll be back with your Daddy in just a second.” “Okay......” “Mr....Um......Sir? Are you there?” “Over here.....Tommy.....He’s next to me.....We can’t move......We’re trapped under something.” “There you are. Are you both okay?” “I-I think my leg is broken. Tommy is shaken, but seems fine. Is Sarah alright?” “She’s fine. Let’s see if we can get you 2 out of here.” In the spirit of true heroinism - is that even a word?? - Dancer does her best and more, carrying 2 children and helping the father walk she guides them to safety and onto the harbourside just as the ship blows a second time! “Sarah! Tommy! You’re alright!” “Daddy’s leg hurts, Mummy.” “Don’t worry.....Everything’s going to be fine.” After the police, the fire department and ambulances have come and gone. Our 2 heros stand alone. “ManMan?” “That’s me.” “We did good today.” “The papers will say it was Lisa and Jarvis though.” “Heh heh. Doesn’t matter though, right?” “Not a bit.” “Nice working with you...........Manny.” “Don’t call me Manny, no one will ever call me Manny....Ever.......Dancy.” “Hm......Can’t see it catching on......Come on, let’s go buy a coffee, I know this great place.....”
Note - This takes place before Dancers involvement with the Scourge and before ManMan left Parodiopolis. Probably.
And there it is! The titanic tale of the meeting of ManMan and Dancer! Hope you enjoyed it folks, I sure enjoyed mysteriously narrating this tale to you! Goodbye!