Adventures In Parodyverse: Burning Down the House Part 4 (UT#288-289 tie-in)

Burning Down The House Part 4 (UT#288-289 tie-in)

    The Psychic Samurai took a small colorful canister off of her belt and looked at it, eyebrow raised, before entering Paddington Station. It was one of CSFB!'s Silly String dispensers, given to her by Liu Xi Xian for luck before she left the Lair Mansion. She wasn't sure she could stand the idea of actually using it, so she hung it on her belt in case she changed her mind.

    Paddington Station had been taken over by Avawarriors. They were going to use it to quickly spread across London by using the Underground and the trains, but British authorities were one step ahead of them. The subway and train had been shut down and London Police were pouring concrete into subway tunnel vents a few miles up the line to stop the Avawarriors from moving.

    They were cornered, for now, at least until they figured out that concrete could easily be cleared with explosives. Chiaki's job - formerly CSFB!'s - was to interrupt their progress and stop them.

    She looked behind her. Armed British soldiers stood by with armored wagons waiting to haul away the Avawarriors as soon as they were disabled and disarmed.

    Chiaki drew her sword and began walking into the train station slowly. She hated the circumstances. The station only had one way in or out, so there was no sneaking past them and sneaking up from behind. No doubt they would be watching the entrance, meaning she'd have to confront them directly. Her hand brushed against the Silly String dispenser again, and she thought about it for just a moment.

    As she went down she could hear the soldiers whispering behind her, wondering if she could do this. That only steeled her resolve - she didn't want to be thought of as inferior to CSFB! just because he had a few amazing abilities.

    The Psychic Samurai raced down the stairs suddenly, knowing from experience that the Avawarriors' weight was their achilles heel. They were powerful, well protected, strong, but all of that extra weight in armor made them slow. Just as she predicted she raced past the door guards before they even realized she was through. She crashed through a door into the utility room and immediately shut off the emergency lights, plunging the tunnel into complete darkness.

    Samurai training made a lot of use of what in modern days is called sensory deprivation. Putting on a blindfold, earmuffs, or both to tune the remaining senses in preparation for very extreme battle situations. Chiaki was absolutely prepared as she moved out of the utility room. Her footsteps were light and almost noiseless. The Avatwarriors moved like tanks, rumbling across the concrete floor as they went.

    They were so noisy, in fact, she could hear them when they stood still. Their armor creaked at the slightest movements, and she had no trouble at all locating her first victim, stabbing it through the back of its armor in one smooth motion, giving it a disabling but non-lethal wound. The Avawarrior clattered to the ground, followed by its sword. The rest heard the sound, clustered together and began moving toward her rapidly like a finely polished military unit.

    Which is exactly what Chiaki wanted. She removed the Silly String from her belt and pointed it toward the approaching tank-like horde, and she listened. Waited until they were in absolute perfect range so she couldn't miss a single one of them with CSFB!'s special string recipe. Chiaki pushed down the trigger and almost smiled at the powerful 'whoosh' the can emitted as a never-ending cascade of sticky string blasted the approaching Avawarriors. She heard them collapse on top of each other. They were squirming but they couldn't get up.

    "Nice going," an ominously confident voice called out to Chiaki from the darkness.

    She felt alarmed that she didn't detect his presence there, and quickly drew her sword. She always trusted her instincts, and she knew this person was dangerous. She began moving around the edge of the room slowly.

    "I could call a thousand more here," the voice told her, "To overrun you and tear you apart like ants destroy a spider. But I won't."

    Chiaki wisely resisted the temptation to reply. It was still possible that he didn't know her location and was just trying to lure her out. At this point she used simple deduction to figure out from the Lair Legion accounts that this was the Avatar speaking to her. She wondered why.

    "I thought I would test you on behalf of the Parody Master," he said. "You're quite intelligent and talented--" He stopped suddenly in a strangled sound, the back of a sharp blade pressed against his neck. He couldn't quite tell where it was coming from. "Very good," he choked. "I didn't expect that."

    With those words, he suddenly vanished into thin air. Chiaki struck at him with violence and precision but too late, and her sword glanced off the concrete wall just behind where he had been standing. Good guess, she thought to herself, he was using the corner opposite the door to maximize acoustics and make himself difficult to find.

    Having nothing left to do she headed toward the stairs, intent on sending the soldiers outside down to clean up. She noted that the Avawarriors she had defeated were still there, rather than having been teleported out along with he Avatar - the price of failure, no doubt.

    She frowned at the soldiers as she exited the train station. They took the hint that it was safe because she was still alive and didn't run out of there frightened, so they began filing in with flashlights and weapons drawn. She ignored them and headed to the Lairjet she left parked in the middle of the closed street.


---

    "You wanted to see me?" Lara Night asked as she entered Hatman's office. She looked at the chairs in front of his desk and noted the Psychic Samurai sitting in one of them calmly.

    "Yeah, um...just sit somewhere please...Sorry, I...I didn't expect you to get here so quickly."

    Lara nodded and sat on the couch in the back of the room and quietly munched on tortilla chips she brought with her.

    "You're not going to reprimand me?" the Psychic Samurai asked, continuing the conversation she was having with Hatman before Lara arrived. "I allowed the Avatar to escape."

    "Chiaki, I wouldn't have even faulted CSFB! himself for letting the Avatar escape," he said. "As far as I'm concerned you achieved your objective. You prevented any of the underprepared soldiers from being killed. And frankly it's amazing because you're not..." He paused, trying to think of the best way to phrase what he meant to say.

    "Endowed with superhuman abilities?" Chiaki asked.

    "Yes." he reluctantly agreed. "Chiaki, you're just like me without the hats. Except I'm not sure I would be able to do what you did."

    "Anyone can," Chiaki corrected him. "It's quite sad, really, how humanity has come to rely on technology over instincts. It gives technologically advanced conquerers like the Parody Master an advantage. He can destroy our technology but he can't take away our instincts."

    Hatman stood behind her and put one hand on her shoulder. "I guess that means Samurai like you are the future of our defense."

    "I'd have to say that's being very generous." Chiaki laughed a little and rose from her seat, picking up her sword from the chair next to her. "I suppose now that CSFB! is back on duty--"

    "How do you know he's...?" He looked at Lara for a moment and suddenly realized how Chiaki figured it out. If Lara was out and about so was CSFB!, since she was looking after him. "Oh. We still might be able to use you if someone else needs some down time."

    "I know." Chiaki looked Jay over slowly, her eyes noting his exhaustion and lack of posture, telling him that he might be the next one who needs filling in for. "I will be available."

    "Thanks, Chiaki," Hatman said as Chiaki bowed to him and quickly left the office, closing the door behind her.

    Lara looked over her own shoulder at Jay as she noticed Chiaki leaving. "So...what did you want to talk to me about?"

    Jay offered her a seat in front of the desk, but because he was standing Lara actually walked over and sat on the desk instead. He turned down her offer of tortilla chips. "I know it's probably none of my business...but I noticed that you and Dream were missing at the same time for about the same number of hours."

    "Oh, well he told me he wouldn't be able to sleep alone, so I--" She paused for a moment, correcting herself mid-sentence. "I lay next to him while he slept and I read a book. That way he could sleep better feeling a warm body next to him."

    "And that's all?" Jay prodded further. He felt ashamed for having to ask that question.

    "Yes," Lara replied. "He talked about something more before he went to sleep but that was just the exhaustion talking. Once he woke up and his brain was clear he changed his mind." She put down the tortilla chips and dusted her hands off. "How come you still try and keep your distance around me Jay?"

    "I don't really," Jay quickly responded. "I like working with you."

    "I mean...it feels like you can't relax around me." Lara thought for a moment and then asked, "It's because of that same reputation again, isn't it? You're never sure if I'm after you."

    Jay couldn't really come up with a reply to that.

    "I think I told you before," Lara continued, "I really am kind of shy. I don't like to make the first move. So if you're not interested in me there's no way anything can happen."

    "That's only part of it." Jay shrugged slightly and looked down. "I've been disappointed in myself a few times because I've so easily fallen into a physical relationship I wasn't really ready for and couldn't sustain. It happened with me and Chiaki." He looked at Lara. "And you're...very attractive. And very sweet. You have a lot of the attributes of someone I could fall for."

    "I'll help you, then," Lara said. "You watch me, and that's easy because I won't try anything. And I'll watch you, and remind you if you get too flirty or starstruck."

    Jay smiled at that. "I guess that's an idea. I like working with you, Lara, you just need to give me some time to get used to you."

    "Okay." Lara slid off the desk and smiled at him.

    "And speaking of which," he added, still smiling, "We really should work together more." His voice lost its upbeat tone and his smile faded as he added, "Most of the other Legionnaires have been going out in pairs. I've been going at it alone all too often, on pretty dangerous missions, and when I do...I worry about whether I'll come back."

    Lara stared into his eyes quietly, her own disappearing smile mirroring his. "I don't want you to have to worry about that, Jay. If you ever do remember I'm willing to go with you."

    "Don't tell the others I said that," Jay suddenly noted. "I've been keeping silent because some of the guys like CSFB!, Trickshot, Yuki...they'll start to insist I take their partners and try to go it alone. I'd rather take all the risk myself then let someone in my charge get hurt. So I tell them it's no problem and my mission will be easy."

    "So you lie to them?" Lara asked.

    "I'm not proud of it," Jay mumbled. "But Lara, we're a small number of people trying to plug a dam with thousands of leaks and if it breaks we're all dead."

    A smile creeped slowly onto Lara's face. "You said 'dam'," she pointed out as she poked him in the chest.

    Jay couldn't help but chuckle at that. "You reminded me of Dream just now," he said. "He does that too."

    "I know. I thought of that when I said it." Lara folded her arms and took a deep breath. "Seriously though. Come get me if you need some company on a scary mission. I'm not the most fearless but at worst we can be scared together."

    "The worst would be CSFB! making fun," Jay pointed out jokingly.

    She smirked as she replied, "If he does just tell him that I said the Lairjet is too cold and your desk is too uncomfortable."

    Jay didn't get it at first, but when he did he laughed.

    Lara took off his baseball cap and gently ran her fingers over his smooth shaven head. "I just had to do that," she said as she put the cap on herself and smiled at him. "Hope it didn't disturb you."

    "Disturb? No, that's not quite the idea." Jay reached over her head and took the cap back, returning it to his own head.

    "Still a little self-conscious?" she asked.

    He nodded. "And a little cold," he admitted.

    "If you need to keep your head warm at night--"

    "No, no." Jay shook his head quickly. "I don't need any help with that."

    "I was going to say I have an extra foam pillow," she continued with a smirk. "They're a bit warmer than a regular one. Better for your neck too."

    "Oh," Jay replied sheepishly. "I guess I can use one of those."

    Lara turned slowly and walked backwards toward the door. "I'll bring it to you later."

TO BE CONTINUED?

-- Story written and copyrighted (C) 2006 by Jason Froikin, and may not be
-- reprinted without permission.
-- Liu Xi Xian, Yuki Shiro, Lara Night, Chiaki Bushido (Psychic Samurai) (C) 2006 by Jason Froikin, all rights reserved
-- All other characters property of their respective owners

Post By Anime Jason Sun Oct 01, 2006 at 01:36:06 am EDT	Subject Adventures In Parodyverse: Burning Down the House Part 4 (UT#288-289 tie-in)

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