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It was a (adjective) day in the Parodyverse. Mayor (proper noun) was (verb) impatiently. Where was that (adjective) leader of the Lair Legion?
"(verb) no more!" Jarvis declared (adverb) as he came (verb) through the door. "What seems to be the (adjective) problem, Mayor (proper noun)?"
"It's that (adjective) Zemo again!" The Mayor replied (adverb). "He's holding (number) people hostage in (place) with a (adjective) (noun)!"
"That evil (noun)!" Jarvis replied (adverb). "Worry not, my (adjective) friend, my (adjective) Lair Legion shall take care of it!"
Later, outside (place)...
"(BZL character)! (BZL character)! It's about time you (verb) here!" Jarvis said (adverb).
"Sorry," (BZL character) said. "I was busy (verb) with (BZL character). (he/she) made me (verb) my (noun) at (place)."
"I don't want to hear about it!" Jarvis snapped (adverb). "We've got to get in there and (verb) those (adjective) hostages!"
"Isn't that a job for the (person)?" (BZL character) asked (adverb).
"Don't be such a cowardly (noun)!" Jarvis answered.
Suddenly, Zemo's commanding voice came from (place). "Here are my completely (advective) demands!" He called. "I want (number) (adjective) (noun), a (adjective) (noun) and a (adjective) (noun) here in one hour or I start (verb) the hostages!"
"That vicious (noun)!" Jarvis cried in horror.
Participants
Thursday, 19-Nov-98 20:33:17
It was a nasty day in the Parodyverse. Mayor Starwars (His parents were either hippies or nerds) was stumbling impatiently. Where was that urban leader of the Lair Legion? (Yo, Jarves, where ya' at, homie?)
"Stumble no more!" Jarvis declaired rampantly as he came pestering through the door. "What seems to be the aggrivating problem, Mayor Starwars?"
"It's that beastlike Zemo again!" The Mayor replied wisely. "He's holding 7,145,324 people hostage (apparently the census taker got away) in Banjooo's undersea Kingdom with a hairy glowstick!" (that sounds a lot ruder than it probably is)
"That evil racquetball!" Jarvis replied well. "Worry not, my mind-boggling friend, my fancy-pants Lair Legion shall take care of it!" (Hey! New uniforms! Love the sequins...)
Later, outside Banjooo's undersea kingdom...
"Lisa! Banjooo! It's about time you emancipated here!" Jarvis said sagely. (why are the Sea Monkeys always the last to be emancipated?)
"Sorry" Lisa said. "I was busy counting with spiffy. (What's with that whole female multiple orgasm thing? That is soooo unfair!) He made me locate my pants at the 7-11." (nah... to easy)
"I don't want to hear about it!" Jarvis snapped unbelievingly. "We've got to get in there and steal those crappy hostages!" (the good hostages are always the first to be taken)
"Isn't that a job for the pool-boy?" Banjooo asked stupidly. (In an undersea kingdom, a pool-boy's job is never done)
"Don't be such a cowardly wall!" Jarvis answered. (once again, these things don't always work...)
Suddenly, Zemo's commanding voice came from Banjooo's undersea kingdom. "Here are my completely grand demands!" He called. "I want 0.4 shiney castles (if you give him 0.5 or 0.3, he'll bitch about it), a woolen tissue (a REAL man uses scratchy wool, not some namsy-pansy aloe soaked 'puffs') and a horrid light here in one hour or I start beating the hostages!" (obviously Zemo would never beat hostages in bad lighting... it causes eye-strain.)
"That vicious copper!" Jarvis cried in horror. (Jarvis is a big Cagney fan, apparently)
Thursday, 19-Nov-98 20:34:25
It was a beautiful day in the Parodyverse. Mayor Barney, the despicable Dinosaur was licking impatiently. Where was that intelligent leader of the Lair Legion?
"Lick no more!" Jarvis declaired suspiciously as he came biting through the door (apparently he didn't think to try the doorknob). "What seems to be the shiney problem, Mayor Barney?"
"It's that round Zemo again! (The Baron had been hitting that Halloween candy pretty hard)" The Mayor replied hypnotically (Have you ever watched Barney? He's repulsive, yet I can't look away...). "He's holding 2502 people hostage in the bathroom (it's a big bathroom) with a fuzzy elephant!" (okay, a REALLY big bathroom)
"That evil pendulum!" Jarvis deviously replied (he seems to be implying that Zemo 'swings both ways', if you get my drift). "Worry not, my spiffy friend (no relation), my ghostly Lair Legion shall take care it!"
Later, outside the bathroom...
"Lisa! Banjooo the colossal Sea Monkey! It's about time you came flailing here!" Jarvis said humorlessly.
"Sorry" Lisa said. "I was busy screaming with spiffy the fern head (This seems pretty self explainitory). He made me twirl my candybar in Parodiopolis." (Is this in the Kama Sutra?)
"I don't want to hear about it!" Jarvis utterly snapped. "We've got to get in there and drive those comic hostages!" (if you can't laugh at hostages, who can you laugh at?)
"Isn't that a job for the lawyers?" Banjooo asked bravely.
"Don't be such a cowardly Zemie Award!" Jarvis answered. (What can I say? this whole 'mad-libs' thing is an inexact science, at best.)
Suddenly, Zemo's commanding voice came from the bathroom. "Here are my completely hideous demands!" He called. "I want 18 forlorn lotto tickets (I guess the forlorn ones have nothing left to lose! Ba-dum-bum.), a short pair of handcuffs and a geeky wheelchair (for his daring getaway, obviously) here in one hour or I start fumbling the hostages!" (I really hope that this is just a sports metaphor)
"That vicious stuffed rabbit!" Jarvis cried in horror. (Who hasn't thought this about our beloved Zemo?)
Monday, 23-Nov-98 13:45:37
It was a doomed day in the Parodyverse. Mayor BossPlaya was stabbing impatiently. Where was that heinous leader of the Lair Legion?
"Stab no more!" Jarvis declaired impossibly as he came killing through the door. "What seems to be the scary problem, Mayor BossPlaya?"
"It's that insane Zemo again!" The Mayor replied unnecessarily. "He's holding 1 person hostage on the moon with an evil monkey!" (Sources say that Neil Armstrong was terrified of monkeys... evil ones especially)
"That evil rock!" Jarvis replied incredibly. "Worry not, my invincible friend, my abominable Lair Legion shall take care of it!"
Later, outside the moon...
"Dynamic Donar! Fing Fang Foom! It's about time you came throwing here!" Jarvis said strangely. (I'll say..)
"Sorry" Donar said. "I was busy fighting with NTU-150. He made me smite my toilet-paper in the USSR." (Verily, t'would be most unseemly to show weakness before yon Commies.)
"I don't want to hear about it!" Jarvis snapped angrily. "We've got to get in there and kick that dead hostage!" (#1 rule in hostage negotiations: Think positively)
"Isn't that a job for the executioner?" Fin Fang Foom asked bravely. (Now there's a union you don't want to cross...)
"Don't be such a cowardly rhino!" Jarvis answered.
Suddenly, Zemo's commanding voice came from the the moon. "Here are my completely sinister demands!" He called. "I want 2 bizarre skulls (I vote for Pauly Shore's and that 'Urkle' kid's...), a mysterious scythe and a mighty AK-47 here in one hour or I start punching the hostage!" (Note to terrorists: It usually works best to bring your ownweapons to a hostage situation. It's pretty rare that the autorities will provide one for you.)
"That vicious mask!" Jarvis cried in horror.
Monday, 23-Nov-98 13:43:42
It was a enormous day in the Parodyverse. Mayor Shoshanna was capitulating impatiently. Where was that inconcievable (His parents didn't seem to have any trouble...) leader of the Lair Legion?
"Capitulate no more!" Jarvis declaired sardonically as he came assailing through the door. "What seems to be the miniscule problem, Mayor Shoshanna?"
"It's that microscopic Zemo again!" The Mayor replied rationally. "He's holding 609 people hostage in Emoh S'ranod with a melancholy omnibus!" (Try reading that sentance out loud. It's fun!)
"That evil computer!" Jarvis replied judicially. "Worry not, my morose friend, my saturnine Lair Legion shall take care of it!" (Aw, cripes... where the hell's my dictionary?)
Later, outside Emoh S'ranod...
"Lisa! Visionary! It's about time you came rationalizing here!" Jarvis said outrageously.
"Sorry" Lisa said. "I was busy digitizing with Yo (and here I had Yo pegged as analog). S/he made me submerge my electricity at LL Mansion." (Is it just me, or does anything Lisa say in these Madlibs sound dirty?)
"I don't want to hear about it!" Jarvis snapped diabolically. "We've got to get in there and encapsulate those circular hostages!"
"Isn't that a job for the stripper?" Visionary asked exponentially. (I get a bigger part if I ask that way)
"Don't be such a cowardly tempest!" Jarvis answered.
Suddenly, Zemo's commanding voice came from Emoh S'ranod. "Here are my completely libidinous demands!" He called. "I want 10,345 avaricious destroyers, a nationalistic trepidation and a faustian warhammer here in one hour or I start to assimilate the hostages!" (RESISTANCE IS FUTILE)
"That vicious mountain!" Jarvis cried in horror.