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Visionary Meets Lisa's Sister Sunday, 05-Mar-2000 21:24:38
“Visionary?” Yo said as he greeted his fellow Legionnaire at the door to the Lair. “You are looking like hell.” “Nay” Donar said as Visionary entered. “I’ve heard that Hel be a maiden most fair.” “No relation.” Yo said. “I meant to say that Visionary is awful in appearance.” “Ah, verily, ‘tis true.” Donar said. “Thanks, Yo.” Visionary muttered. “It’s good to see you too.” He had been a bit out of sorts for the last few days. He wasn’t sleeping well at night, and as a result he was more and more jumpy and irritable. “Is Jarvis around? I need to talk to him.” “No” Yo answered happily. “He is expected soon, though.” Yo walked with Visionary to the Lair’s rec. room, where various Legionnaires were relaxing. “What is it that is troubling you? Most everyone has forgiven bowling night.” ( Visionary had been consciously avoiding the Lair until the insurance check cleared and the Legion was able to replace everything that had been stolen by Zemo). “I don’t know...” Visionary answered. “Something’s just not *right*. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but things seem different, somehow.” He plopped himself on the end of the sofa. “Chip?” A voice to his right asked. Visionary turned to accept the Frito-Lay’s bag and found himself face-to-face with Moo. “GAAAHHHH!” he screamed, falling off the couch. “Not bad.” Starseed noted critically, not looking up from the magazine he was reading. “But you need to work on the inflection a bit.” “What?” a perplexed Moo asked, looking at the Ruffles bag. “These are the real deal, not those ‘Olestra’ ones.” Visionary grasped Yo by his shirt front. “Do you see a cow-headed woman sitting on the couch?” Yo nodded. Visionary sighed in relief and ran his trembling fingers through his hair. “Thank God.” he said. “I thought I was having a ‘Gilgamesh’ flashback.” “I see you’ve met my evil sister, Moo.” Lisa said cheerfully as she entered the room with the onion dip. “Here, are you happy?” she asked her sister, “this one has the USDA seal on it.” Visionary cautiously regained his seat. “Evil sister?” He looked Moo up and down. “You wouldn’t happen to be foreign too, would you?” “What’s that?” Moo asked. “Never-mind.” Visionary said, slumping into the sofa cushions. Moo shot her sister a sidelong glance. “You didn’t happen to... er, you know... with *that* one, did you?” “Visionary?” Lisa answered. “Jeez, give me some credit...” “Hey!” Visionary said indignantly when he caught on. “What’s that supposed to mean? We never... you know... because I’m married!” Lisa settled in at the other end of the couch. “You keep telling yourself that, sport.” Visionary sat and sulked for a moment while they all watched television. Finally, however, his curiosity got the better of him. “Soooo...” he said to Moo. “You’re evil, huh?” “Yep.” she answered, dipping a chip. “Are you here to join the Legion?” “Not really” she said. “I was just in the neighborhood and thought I’d mooch some free food from my sister. Well, that and harass her into editing my writing.” “What else are relatives for?” Lisa said sarcastically. “Hey, I admitted I was evil, didn’t I?” Moo answered mildly. “So, eh, what makes you evil?” Visionary asked. “Boredom, mostly.” Moo answered with a shrug. “I figure that bad girls have more fun.” “Are you looking for a nemesis?” Visionary asked hopefully. Everyone else seemed to have a nemesis but him. Moo looked at him critically. “I had been thinking of being Lisa’s, but that *would* make Thanksgiving dinner a bit awkward.” She turned towards her sister. “What do you think?” “You could do better.” She answered. “In fact, you’d almost have too.” Visionary stifled another protest. He was beginning to wonder if he didn’t already have a nemesis after all. “In any event...” he said, trying to regain some control of the conversation, “you might want to look into joining the Scourge of the BZL.” “Who?” Moo asked. “Zemo’s troops.” Lisa answered. “They’re an interesting bunch. Mostly evil, or at least misguided. Pretty decent bowlers, though.” “Why didn’t you join them?” Moo asked. “Me?” Lisa said in mock surprise. “Join a group with such questionable morals? In case you’ve forgotten, *I’m* the good sister, as pure as the driven snow.” “True.” Yo agreed happily. Moo looked at Yo closely. She turned to her sister. “Did you...?” she asked, nodding her head towards Yo. “Of course” Lisa answered. “Does anyone know when Jarvis is due back?” Visionary said, holding his head in defeat. “Not really.” Lisa answered. “What did you need to talk to him about?” Visionary looked uncomfortable. “I’m not really sure... I mean, I have no proof...” he cleared his throat. “I think that someone might be trying to kill me.” Moo thought about it. “I could see that.” she admitted. Lisa chuckled as Visionary’s shoulders slumped. “Relax, would ya’? Who hasn’t tried to kill you?” She paused to dip a chip. “I mean, remember that time Zemo tried to mulch you? Or when Anti-Visionary shot you? Not to mention Byrne, Blofish, Virtual Zemo, the Parody Master, Lector, Micheal Myers, The Man Who’s Everywhere, and a whole slew of Pokemon, mimes and such...” “Well, yeah...” Visionary admitted. “But this seems... different somehow.” “Not to worry.” Yo assured him. “Legionnaire’s are one for all, all for one.” “Yeah, nobody’ll get to you while we’re around.” Lisa added reassuringly. “And if they do, I promise I won’t defend them in court.” She paused as she considered something. “We’ll, if they’re rich I might, but I’ll do a really half-assed job on the appeal, if it should somehow come to that.” “Thanks.” Visionary said dryly. Lisa winked at him. “Hey, what are friends for?” From October or maybe November of '98 |
| It's Visionary's last night here, and all he has are these lousy reposts... (Visionary) (05-Mar-2000 21:13:16) |
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